The 3 Things God Revealed to Me While Fasting

This past October, I answered a call from God to host a community fast for the month of October. At first, I was so hesitant to do the fast because number one, it was my favorite season and I was ready to enjoy the fall season. I was ready for smores and pumpkin spice lattes. Sadly, that was the first thing I thought about. During this time of the year, I begin to slow down and really take in the season. But when God calls us as believers, the only thing we know is to be obedient and follow God’s instruction. That is our faith; our faith is being leveled up. We begin to experience something that is bigger than us when we answer the call. That is what happened in the month of October. It was a true experience with God like never before. God removed some layers off of my life that was holding back from what He was needing to do. A Lot was revealed to me- a true reality check. When God is ready to tell you something, it will come as real as it gets. And, I love that about God. God revealed to me so much but today I am going to share three big things God really dealt with me on. God dealt with me on the way He works in my life to speak over others lives, my call has so many people attached to it and it is not about me and the spiritual gift of faith that He gave me.

When God placed the fast on my heart, it was one of the most beautiful things. God placed Psalms 51:10 in my heart as I prayed over the fast. Psalm 51:10 says, “Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me. It was a much needed scripture for the season. God began to take me through studying the four seasons we experience here on earth and the meaning of each season spiritually. And, I began to specifically study the Fall season and God revealed to me the Fall season being a season of transition. As the trees begin to lose leaves and leaves change colors, the relation is God changing somethings within us. This is a season of letting go and allowing God to release things from you that do not align with who God is. Things literally are “falling” so that you can draw closer to God and become strong in God for the cold winter season that is to come. The important things God brought out clearly through prayer calls and fast check-ins via zoom:

• Many are bleeding like the woman with the bleeding disorder and have access to come to Him and be healed. And, God was calling for our faith to be enough to believe and have healing.

• We have been set free because of Christ but many of us are still in bondage because of our minds. That is where the attacks come more. Galatians 5:1 confirms that we were set free, we have to walk in that with faith.

• It is time to “pick up our mat and walk”. We want an answer to the prayer. We want healing. We want our lives to change. But now it is time to get up and walk. Season after season, year after year we sit there and watch time go by and waddle in our feelings and unbelief and never activate our faith by just getting up and walking in what God has for us. If God gave it to us, it is ours. The story revealed was The Healing By the Pool” in John 5:1-15.

• That God is calling for us to live a life through Christ each and every day. We are called to bear fruit in our daily lives. God is calling us to point to Him in all we do. It is less of us in our lives and more of Him. We do the kingdom work each day and in every moment.

• God’s love is the highest form of love and we have access to that love.

#1- Speaking Life into Myself and Teaching Others to do the Same

When I started on a journey to speak life into others, it began with me knowing that I needed to speak life into my situation and into myself. I really was dealing with a lot of insecurity and negativity within my own thought life. Going to God about this issue of lack of love to speak life over myself and my life, God redefined love for me in a way that He began to take me down a road to loving myself because I was His. The beautiful thing about that is that as I drew closer to God, I began to hear God’s direction in speaking life into others as they endured difficult situations and transitions in life. I have literally watched God bring “dead situations” or “end of the story” issues that people were going through to blessing them with that very thing that they thought would never be possible. God used me to speak to life into them so that they could remember how good God is and that He is a miracle worker. He wanted them to hear Him. The truth is God literally puts in my spirit a message to declare over their lives. It just reminds me that it is so important to know that the enemy comes to kill and destroy through any channel he can get in and the thoughts are easy access if you do not BELIEVE. Listen, the second I turned to God for my thought to be filled with Him my life transformed as I gained confidence in what God is to me in my life and because I am His, I am saved and free from the enemy’s tricks and schemes. Each day, I uplift myself through God’s Word and God uses me to remind others of the same. I do not take it lightly the gift and responsibility that God has called on my life as I have seen pregnancies turned into birth of babies, marriages, healing from sickness and environments shift right before my eyes.

#2- The Call is not About Me, It is About God's People

I came to God, I was broken. I was lost. I was literally bleeding out and no one could see. Behind closed doors, I was sad and lonely. On the outside, I had everything that one could ask for but inside I was in deep pain. People’s words pricked my heart as days went by. The past haunted me reminding me that I would never be worthy. The lies, tricks and schemes of the enemy had me in a place where I felt darkness around me each day. I pleaded out to God that I just wanted to feel different. I did not want to suffer anymore. I wanted more than the life I lived and saw. I always heard about God from others but I needed Him more than ever in my life as I started on my faith journey in 2013.

The first story in the bible that God brought to me was Daniel and the Lions Den. When I tell you, I was in goosebumps when I read and studied this story in the bible. But, now that I look back God was redefining love for me and reminding me that through everything point to Him. In life situations, pray and seek Him. God was really defining that He had me but there would be some lions in my journey but He needs me to glorify Him in all situations.

Through transitioning to deepening my relationship with God currently, I was reminded of this time in my life to understand that there are so many people trapped in that season of their life. And, God revealed to me that I could not continue to pick up the burdens I left with Him in that moment and forget the call. Truth is, there were times I went back to God it's me and God I am hurting and asking God why He called me to hold all this weight in the position of leadership He put me in within my ministry. God reminded me that it is for the people He is bringing to Him not about me. Sometimes we get so stuck and selfish into playing the “what about me God?” game but God is truly doing a work in us as we are following His will and way for our life. Listen, God called you because He knew you were best fit for the job in the kingdom. What we do each day as followers of Christ is for the kingdom. Adopt that thinking into your mindset. Each and every moment is for God in this life we live. The call is higher than us. God’s will be done in our lives as we follow Him each day. You just have to have the faith.

#3- The Spiritual Gift of Faith and Teaching to Others

For years, I have quieted myself from the belief that God could be using me for more than what is seen on the outside. I really have always been blown away from what God does in my life and those around me. Then, one day God reminded me that the enemy wants me to be quiet because the enemy knew much of my gift to encourage and push people in having faith. Whether it is through my blogs, through prayer, through videos that I have the ability to pass a power of faith into someone else in their journey. God, literally brought me out of things unimaginable or I thought was impossible to come out of. I have seen God change my name in 2013 as I walked across the stage and He uttered to me that He had more for my life. I walked into a life with God. God changed my life from being a troubled teenager with depressive thoughts to a woman of God who is on fire for God. I went from not knowing God to knowing God as my Father.

Battling my own demons as I fasted, I had a few days where I sat in a face full of tears because I did not understand why God would use me. Literally, I battled with my story and how people won’t believe me. I sat in tears literally battling my identity of who I am not against who I used to be. It was literally time to fully let go of that person I was before because God had changed my name. My faith is what got me here today. God comforted me in those times and reminded me that I am His own and my faith is what got me here today. He ministered to my heart all of the great stories in the bible like Daniel and the Lions Den, David and Goliath, The Woman with the Blood Disorder, Joseph and His Dreams, and Healing at the Pool. Then, God released to me that I have the gift of faith on others behalf. I was taunted by reminders of people’s doubt in the dream that God gave me. I specifically remember when I was a youth director and someone laughed at my ideas and told me that my programs would not be as successful and jokingly laughed that I had a lot of faith. And, as I battled with that, God literally comforted me as He placed on my heart to encourage others to have big faith. The peace that came over me after I sat with God in tears was unexplainable. I felt like boulders were lifted off of my shoulders and I began to get up and praise and worship and said my yes to this gift of faith God was giving me. A new journey. A new beginning. A new level of faith.

I just want to remind you that you can always come to a place of surrender for God. You can always come back to Him. He will be there waiting with open arms. God loves us. God calls us daughters and loves each and every part of who we are. Taking out time to focus on God in our daily lives is so important. It is not about what is here in the world. It is about what is going on in the heavens. It is above us. It is more than us. It is bigger than us. So we have to fast and pray. We have to continue to align ourselves with God. We have to continue to walk out in this journey and life that call has for us. Sometimes we stray. Sometimes we get lost. But, we can always draw closer to God by fasting and prayer. May fasting transform your life and you be blessed. May God do a BIG thing in your life from your BIG faith!

Peace & Blessings,

Toni